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So I lied to youmyself. I said I was going to double post last week to make up for the week that I didn’t post and I didn’t do it. The best part is that I already had this blog written and everything, just too lazy to proofread and then hit the publish button. How sad is that? So I will try to do better, which means two weeks of double posts. But not this week, this week is almost done and I think I have it in me to pull another blog out of my butt in 3 days.

Of course me being bass ackwards you there are some pretty good odds that I will write one and then post it before the weekend, cause that’s how I roll. Love to contradict life. Anyway on to the blog which is coming up…..

Now.

I have a couple of books already in the shoot waiting to be read. I’m currently reading Let’s Explore Diabetes with Owls, by David Sedaris. After that I will be delving into the weirdness of Haruki Murakami in IQ84. Depending on if the spirit moves me or not you might get a blog review for one or both of those, I don’t know we’ll see.

I’m always on the lookout for my next fix though. Some months or more ago I was Captain Barbosa-ing some content on the web, and I found a very tantalizing and impossible to resist item. Namely 3.77GB of kindle formatted books. I’m sure my heart stopped for a while. I circled my prey like an ocelot, because I small dangerous and adorable…also sharks can swim and I can’t and I was feeling guilty about my analogy lie.

I backed off though. It was too much. I did the math and going at a reasonable 2 books a week, which I can crush easily, It would take me something like 23 years to finish the entire library. Never mind any other books that aren’t included in the download that I might want to read. Also there was the little hiccup of the challenge I had laid out for myself to read the books I currently own before getting new ones. So I let the prey escape….

Then I chased it down, bit into the soft spot on the back of the neck, severing its spine, and dragged it back to my lair to be consumed.

I couldn’t help myself. I think my efforts of self restraint should be commended. I’d seen this download a year or two before and resisted its call then too. I have a terabyte external hard drive so none of you technowizards need concern yourself with how much space I’m wasting or how much I’m slowing my computer down.

So you’d think, she has 22 years worth of books to read, surely she’ll be able to select a new book within that or choose one of the other 100 or so books that she owns to make her next reading assignment?

Hahaha!……

HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Ahem, sorry. You think with your logic and it makes you a fool. I really can’t decide. I have so many that I already have, that I can’t make a decision. And what’s worse is that I don’t wanna. I want something new. Because according to a very wise man on the hit television series How I Met Your Mother, “New is always better.”

So I came up with this brilliant idea, which is why I hate myself.

The idea started off as being just brilliant. I decided that I was going to read the top 5 books on the NY Times Best Seller list and review them. No matter what the book was, unless it was the sequel to something then I could choose a replacement a little further down the list. Great idea right?

No. Nope. No. Terrible, awful, horrendous idea. Have you seen the best seller list? As of the writing of this blog, it’s this:

HARDCOVER FICTION

  1. THE ENGLISH GIRL, by Daniel Silva
  2. INFERNO, by Dan Brown
  3. THE CUCKOO’S CALLING, by Robert Galbraith
  4. FIRST SIGHT, by Danielle Steel
  5. AND THE MOUNTAINS ECHOED, by Khaled Hosseini

Are you kidding me?! I have just conscripted myself, into reading a Danielle Steel and Dan Brown novel. The only thing those two books will be good for is constructing an origami samurai sword for which I can use to commit seppuku.

Why do it then you’re probably wondering. Well, it’s like this, I figure that if I’m going to be reviewing books on here so much that maybe readers would like reviews of some new books versus me waxing philosophical about 1984 and Fahrenheit 451.  Two fantastic novels that have bearing on our development as a society, but aren’t exactly current events material.  Also, as some of you may know, I have dreams of working in some capacity in the field of publishing. So I thought if i end up writing book reviews that I won’t be able to just review the books that interest me all the time. I’ll have to step out of my comfort zone and this could be good practice.

So I hate myself for this idea, and for this contract I’ve established with myself, and for allowing Danielle Steel to still exist. I’m going to attempt to go through with it however. Even though I can feel myself trying to come up with excuses to replace those two already. Inferno, stars the same central character from Angels and Demons and The Da Vinci Code, we’ll call him Tom Hanks with long hair since I can’t remember his real name. I attempted to read the The Da Vinci Code, some years back, but the writing style was too basic and the movie proved to me that I missed out on nothing. In any case, this link makes me think I can technically count this as a sequel because people, places, and things might be mentioned that may require me to have prior knowledge of the other books.

Also the third author on the list is a nom de plume for J. K. Rowling, in case you hadn’t heard.

Before I cemented this idea into place, though I had to do a little searching to see how I could acquire these novels for free, because I’m not buying Danielle Steele and Dan Brown. Also I’m poor. So I looked in my secret treasure finding island to see if there were some there. I got lucky with a couple, they had them and they were kindle compatible, but then a brick wall. The others weren’t listed or were, but in some format that I don’t even know what device they were for (I know .epub and .mobi, I’m pretty sure .kltpzyxm is a Superman villain)

So I thought to myself, check the library, maybe they’ll have some. Went to the local library catalog page, and as soon as it opens, each one of the books I was looking for popped up immediately. Apparently there is a widget that lists all of the NY Times Best Sellers of varying categories. Along with those from USA Today, but who cares about them.

The Library. Coming through for me, even when I really don’t want it to.

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